Quo Vadis? My Heartfelt Open Letter to the LGBTQIA+
(Click below to listen.)
Mind & Heart Are Not In-Sync
I need your help. My mind and heart do not seem to be in sync anymore. I am confused. This troubling phenomenon happens when a Pride parade comes around. My heart goes out to you. But my mind entertains some mild revulsion at some scenes I witness during this annual event.
Three Recent Human Stories That Trigger This Piece
From Nova Scotia
First: A news feature coming out of Nova Scotia told a story of a school valedictorian who came out of the closet during a graduation speech. Quinn Legg humbly declared,
“From a very young age I knew I was very different. The body I was born in does not match who I identify as.”
Quinn made the gamble of a lifetime. There was so much uncertainty as to how the audience would react to the revelation. What came next was a very heart-warming reception: A standing ovation followed.
And I would like Quinn to know that I am adding my own applause for that bravery. I do not have the slightest inkling as to how it feels being not at home with my own body.
A Christian family
Second: A CNN interview of a Christian preacher’s family’s journey in accepting their only son’s transition into being a daughter. Their heart was torn between upholding their faith and their duty to their child. Their parental love won, but their journey would be long and hard.
And my heart goes out to this family.
The twerking guy
Third: There was this video taken from this year’s Pride parade in Minneapolis, where a man could be seen twerking in front of children. He was wearing a white pair of underwear, boots, white socks, and a rainbow band around his tights. Most in the crowd were cheering on him, and some children laughing and dancing. But some parents could be seen feeling very uncomfortable with the sight and turning their kids from the view of the twerking man. That clip was posted on social media and was viewed 5 million times.
My heart broke thinking what was in the minds of those kids. I, myself, who tried hard to keep an open mind, thought that sight so gross and repulsive.
Is This Video The Definition Of What LGBTQ+ Is About?
The video sent many conservatives and anti-LGBTQ+ extremists into a conflagration. To them, this is evidence that the Pride parade is nothing but a congregation of wackos and cuckoos.
There isn’t an iota of homophobic cell in my body. And I do not consider myself conservative; in fact, I have never been a fan of that kind of label. But when I saw that video, I felt a deep sense of dismay. If that scene was a representative of what LGBTQ+ is all about, then I do not mind being called a conservative. But common sense tells me it was not.
Because I truly believe those belonging to the LGBTQ+ community are more than that kind of sight. And I also believe that most of them do not find that guy displaying his hanging balls having any good taste at all.
My Personal Story On LGBTQ+
Gay and Lesbian
Long before I even heard about LGBTQ+ I already knew my heart would be on their side. It was in the summer of 1981 when I put my very life on the line for someone I barely knew personally.
During this time, I only understood that people who were not considered as heterosexual were grouped into gay and lesbian. And, yes, both were commonly considered as some weirdos who deserved derision and disrespect. But not with me.
A Crime I Witnessed
One night on my way home I witnessed a commotion in a dark alley in the neighborhood. As I looked closer, I could see five figures standing over another person who was struggling in a fetal position. He was protecting his head from the brutal kicking and punching from the five men. Then I realized I recognized those five; sometimes I played hoops with them at the community center. What happened next was an event that I would never forget in my lifetime.
My Foolish Instinct
Not only did I recognize the assailants. The poor guy on the ground was somebody I also knew in the community. He was a schoolteacher! But it was not the reason why I rushed myself into the fray and flung my body over his. He was gay. I would witness many scenes when neighborhood bullies would harass and taunt him every chance they got. In that instant my common sense and sense of self-preservation flew out the window. And I got the brunt of their anger.
The Bloody Mess I Found Myself In
A couple of hours afterward I realized I was still sitting beside him. And I could feel my own whole body shaking. I felt blood streaming down my face, my left eye was shut, and I thought I broke some ribs. I felt so much terror and fear.
Where Were The Police?
This happened in an era when the advent of cellphones was unthinkable. And going to the police would mean leaving the guy alone in the dark. I didn’t even know if he would survive, all I presumed was he was still breathing. Even the thought of reporting the crime to the police sounded foolish – a gay person being the victim would surely elicit ridicule and laughter. The poor guy was a victim not only of grave physical assault, but he was also robbed of wallet and watch.
For years to come the two of us would become life-long friends.
The “Funny” Couple
Another unforgettable encounter that I had with these “different” people was this unusual couple in town. He was my favorite barber; for almost ten years I would never allow anybody to cut my hair but him. No matter where I would be while travelling, I would put on hold this monthly ritual, until I got back home to see him. (This was the time when the balding gene inherited from my mother’s side had not made its appearance yet, and my full hair was still my vanity. And barbers were still called barbers, not haircutters or hairstylist.)
Funny in a friendly way
Now, people looked at this couple as “funny” because my barber was a full-bloodied gay, and his partner was a lesbian. Not only was she a lesbian, but she also worked as a security guard at a bank. So, the running joke was, “Who wore the pants in the house?”
But what stood out about this couple was that people respected them. And they had earned it. They lived the kind of life, behaved in the kind of way, that commanded nothing but respect. Just like any ordinary human being.
The Twerking Guy In Minneapolis
Which brings me to that video about the fat and bald guy, naked except a pair of underwear and boots, twerking in front of the public. And the video seems to convey that he is a participant of the parade.
He is not alone. That kind of scene during Pride parade is not uncommon. In fact, from where I sit, it looks like it is becoming more common. Wherever a Pride parade occurs, many participants dressing up and behaving in the same manner are now appearing synonymous with what LGBTQ+ is all about. And I haven’t heard or read any prominent organizers speaking up honestly about this. Really?
You Have Come A Long Way
I am personally happy with what the LGBTQ+ Movement has accomplished over the years. And my number one wish is that this group will continue to keep in mind its heroic roots. Just like any movement with noble causes, where it is now had come with a steep price.
Brief History Of The LGBT Movement In The US
It is to be noted that the origins of the United States of America are rooted in the Colonies, in the early 1600’s. Its foundation was established with Puritan or Christian norms. So, when it came to a family structure, the husband and wife were always a man and a woman team. This means, in its infancy the early colonies already criminalized homosexuality (or sodomy).
However, it was only in recent decades that the issue of homosexuality was addressed head on. This came about due to the evolutions and changes in society itself.
Timeline
1950’s
This decade saw the persecution of the gay and lesbian community, as well as the collective effort to address their many concerns. The Mattachine Society was founded in Los Angeles in 1950, to fight for and promote the rights of gay men. And the Daughters of Bilitis followed in 1955 in San Francisco, as the first lesbian civil and political rights organization.
These two prominent groups had made so much difference in the lives of gays and lesbians, as they provided venues for support, discussions, and instrumental in encouraging its members to come into the open and assimilate into society just like any heterosexual members.
1960’s
The LGBT movement gained worldwide prominence brought about by numerous riots in New York after police made a fateful raid on Stonewall Inn on June 28, 1969. This establishment was a popular refuge for gay men. After numerous raids previously, the LGBT community had had enough. On that particular raid, a large group of gay men fought back. From this experience the movement became more empowered, bolstered by the support of the American Civil Liberties Union, the Lutheran Church, and the American Bar Association. Thereupon, the LGBT movement grew to become a worldwide crusade.
1970’s
The fight continued, gaining successes in other areas of American society that affected the LGBT community. One big accomplishment was the change in the classification of homosexuality as a disease by the American Psychiatric Association. The promotion of tolerance and social integration went mainstream that included colleges and universities. And there was a bigger shift toward involvement in civil rights struggle.
In 1978 the Rainbow Flag was born. It is the same one used today, with minor changes in color.
The succeeding decades saw huge changes in American society: the fight against homophobia, the promotion of equal rights, the deconstruction of traditional understanding of what constituted masculinity and femininity, the abolition of sodomy law, legalization of same-sex marriage, and many others.
Canada Experience
Meanwhile, north of the border, the LGBT movement became prominent too. They have their own version of Stonewall Inn watershed moment. This came in the form of Pussy Palace Raid on September 14, 2000, by the Toronto Police. The Pussy Palace was a favorite bathhouse of lesbians. The societal impact of this single event would reverberate for years to come.
The Cold War Purge
The history of LGBTQ in Canada has darker tone to it. Due to the Red Scare during the cold war, massive paranoia had crept into the Canadian consciousness. There was a great fear that the communist USSR was influencing every fiber of society. Suddenly, suspected spies were hunted among its civil servants.
Homosexuality Was A National Security Risk
The most prominent cases involved the purging of the rank and file in the government, most especially in the security agencies.
The Royal Canadian Mounted Police (RCMP) formed a specialized unit called “Character Weakness”, targeting the gay and lesbian civil servants. Being a homosexual, as the theory went, made one very vulnerable to blackmail by agents of the communists.
So many lives had been ruined. Victims are still around to share this very sad chapter of Canadian history related to the persecution of the LGBTQ community.
To get a firsthand account of this Canadian Experience, you may watch the following videos.
Accomplishments In Canada
Pride flag on Parliament Hill
On June 1, 2016, the Pride flag was raised on Parliament Hill for the first time in Canadian history by Prime Minister Justin Trudeau. According to him:
“This is a great day for Canada, and it is part of a long series of milestone this country has hit over the years. It hasn’t been easy; it hasn’t been automatic. A lot of people fought for a long time for this day and for the many days that led up to this day to happen.”
A lot of Canadians were not really into it. And this divided sentiment continues to this day, especially when the Pride flag is raised at the start of every Pride month. To them, the Maple Leaf on Parliament Hill represents all Canadians. With the Pride flag, it conveys an unfair message that the LGBTQ2S+ is distinctively special.
So, as to making this decision helping the inclusivity and visibility message of the group, it remains to be seen.
Politicians joining Pride parade
That same year, 2016, Mr. Trudeau became the first sitting prime minister to join the Pride parade in Toronto. And over the years, politicians of all stripes and all levels have become regular fixtures to every Pride parade in the communities. As to whether these politicians are really into it and not just feeling the pressure to be there, only they know.
Quo Vadis?
My one and only question to the LGBTQ2S+ community in Canada:
(Oh. By the way, which one is it: LGBTQ2S+, 2SLGBTQ, or LGBTQIA+?)
Is it possible to add some highlights in every Pride parade? Something to remind the community of the many positive contributions of the LGBTQ2S+ in different areas of society?
During Black History month, organizers behind this annual celebration try to do this by highlighting the accomplishments of black people in society. They also guide the people down memory lane, to remind them of the great challenges and hardships of black people in different eras. And for a month they make great use of mass media for this.
Is there room for these kinds of activities during Pride Month, too? Because I haven’t seen them being promoted on tv. And if these are happening in the community, many like me have no clue at all.
If inclusivity and visibility are the rallying cry of the LGBTQ2S+, please give those who do not identify themselves in any of those acronyms more reasons to celebrate and go out during the Pride parade.
And please think about that fat and balding twerking guy from Minneapolis. Especially nowadays that so-called “conservatives” and “anti-LGBTQ2S+ extremists” are fuming mad at obscene spectacles like this.
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